This post is about getting unstuck. From negative patterns and thinking. From feeling unmotivated, lost or restless. Or worse, stuck in an unwanted situation, job or relationship.
Who hasn’t felt unmotivated, lethargic and a little lost at some point in their life and without a single idea about what to do next? Not even really caring. For some people, these feelings may persist for years, while for others, last just a few weeks here and there.
Whatever is keeping us from doing what we are only thinking about can keep us in a holding pattern
Regardless of how or how long we struggle, stuck is stuck. And whatever is keeping us from doing what we are only thinking about can quickly keep us in a holding pattern. It’s that pattern where we make all sorts of excuses to convince ourselves why we can’t or shouldn’t take action to get ourselves moving.
For those who have experienced trauma or intense pain, getting stuck in life is a real thing. Often, it’s due to a lack of self-confidence from fear related to our past experiences. It can create a feeling of general disinterest within and literally freeze us into place. Keeping us stuck right where we are. It’s easy to succumb to our vulnerabilities without hope we’ll ever be able to free ourselves from our struggles.
Break the cycle of struggle
As a bereaved mom, I’m a huge advocate of making every attempt we can to try to break the cycle of pain and struggle that can be debilitating. While it takes effort to want to feel better and improve our lives, it’s worthwhile when we see positive changes happening.
While this post is not about the pandemic, the struggle it’s created for millions of people has helped those of us who already felt disadvantaged, feel like we’re all on a more level playing field trying to survive this world. We feel less isolated in our struggle because so many people are willing to speak more openly about their own. The global crisis has unleashed our desire to share our stories because we know we’re in this together.
Just talking about our struggles won’t ease them
But just talking about our struggles won’t ease them. We have to take action. Because we are wired to feel successful and have social connections, not being able to do things the same way has presented a huge struggle for millions of people. But because people in severe pain already live this way, the pandemic has also given us the opportunity to develop greater compassion for everyone’s plight.
I recently read an article that stated people have become lackadaisical. Situations are changing rapidly for better or worse. This has made people feel uncertain. We have no sense of an ending to this pandemic. We don’t know when (or if) we can return to any normalcy. Which is exactly what it feels like when we are struck with any tragedy.
The more time passes, and we see things aren’t changing, the easier it is to become lackadaisical. We have to push ourselves to get unstuck from the lethargy, indifference, lack of energy and idleness.
Being positive drives us
It’s important to get unstuck from whatever is challenging us to stay positive. Being positive is what drives us to want to reach for more. Any change we can bring into our lives when we don’t feel motivated is a necessary first step to help us feel better and create bigger changes in time.
Ways to get unstuck:
- Start an activity with someone. (I reconnected with a friend and we take weekly hikes.)
- Commit to increasing your outdoor activity level just 10-15%. Getting stuck in our heads can keep us inactive. (I walk more . As an incentive , I use the StepsApp but avoid being vigilant about counting steps.)
- Take on a special project. (I painted my kitchen cupboards. The project was fun, gave me a new skillset and the confidence to share a video to help others create a beautiful product).
- Take an online course. (Many people are creating digital courses on just about everything. I’ve taken several free ones to learn new skills, connect with others and design a roadmap for the future.)
- Take up a hobby. It doesn’t have to be all time-consuming or expensive. Choose something that ‘s fun and will get you a result. (I perfected my sourdough starter and am considering brewing kombucha tea.)
While some or all of the above may seem cliché, the point to getting unstuck is about the mental process. It’s about introducing new ideas into your brain and saying yes sometimes when you’d rather say no, to get the ball rolling.
It’s not about making big changes all at once. Where you’ll more likely end up frustrated and disappointed before you even get started. By slowly reconditioning your mind to choose things that are healthier for your mind and body, you will get even bigger results over time. Where you’ll naturally want to do more simply because you feel better. The surest way I know to getting and staying unstuck.
For more info about other books and what I do visit vonnesolis.com.